Handling of Emotions

constructive handling of emotions

1.

ACKNO-WLEDGE

(Notice)

What physical reactions do I notice in myself? – blushing, sweating, lump in the throat, tears, dry mouth, shaking?

Am I marshalling my defenses?

EXPERI-ENCING

BE

ATTEN-TIVE!!

2.

 

NAME

(Clarify)

What am I feeling?

Why am I feeling this way?

– objective reason for my feeling

– subjective reason for my feeling

What is this feeling telling me about

          myself?

          the other to whom I am relating?

          the situation?

 

 

 

UNDER-STANDING

 

 

BE INTELLI-GENT!!

3.

OWN

Do I accept that I am experiencing this feeling?

Do I accept it without labeling it as good or bad?

Do I take responsibility for it now?

Do I blame myself for experiencing it?

Do I accept it without blaming others for it?

 

 

 

ACCEPT-ING

BE

REALI-STIC!!

4.

 

 

 

JUDGE

Can I calmly look at the emotion and place it next to the values which I hold important in my life?

What does rational wanting tell about this feeling?

          Is it O.K. to express it?

          What are the consequences?

          What are the alternatives?

 

 

 

EVALUA-TING

 

BE

REASO-NABLE!!

5.

 

 

ACT

(Integrate)

Do I decide according to what is good-in-itself or what is good-for-me?

Has Value got primacy over Need?

How will I integrate the feeling with reason?

What is my course of action?

          how much of my feeling to be expressed?

          how much of it to be suppressed or sublimated?

 

DECIDING

 

 

 

BE RESPON-SIBLE!!

Personal exercise:

  • Analyse one of your recent emotional episode to see how you lived it:
    • the name of the emotion
    • Which part of your body was affected by it?
    • What were the thoughts in your mind?
    • How did you manage the situation and how do you evaluate your way of living your emotions.
  • If the same situation arises, what difference would you like to make in the way you acted?

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